


I Just Want This

by endemictoearth



Category: My Mad Fat Diary
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-18
Updated: 2016-10-18
Packaged: 2018-08-23 06:04:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8316610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/endemictoearth/pseuds/endemictoearth
Summary: This was a line prompt (see title), with the request for Finn/Izzy (platonic!) So, enjoy a little of the Fizzy friendship . . .





	

Chop was up at the bar, laughing loudly at something the bartender said, before starting to pontificate about something himself. Probably about himself. Boy could bluster with the best of them.

Finn looked down at his pint and shook his head, laughing. After taking a swig, he looked over at Izzy, the only other member of the gang to arrive so far. She was staring intently at Chop, her eyes uncharacteristically serious as they studied his movements, her head tilted at an angle to try and catch a snippet of what he was saying. Finn gave her a sad smile, and Izzy bit her lip, dragging her eyes away from Chop’s wide mouth, stretched wider still by a toothy grin. She looked down at the table and pulled her alcopop closer with one hand, leaning in to take a sip from the straw stuck in it.

Finn leaned over and lightly knocked her shoulder with his. “He’s an idiot, y’know?”

Izzy’s mouth twisted around her straw to form a wry smile. She sat up, sighing. “Yeah. I know.” She started to peel the label off the bottle in front of her, finger pushing through the soggy mix of paper and adhesive. “I just …”

Finn didn’t want to push her, but when she didn’t continue after a long pause, he asked, “You just?”

Her eyes flicked back up to the bar, lingering fondly on Chop. “I just … want this.” She bit her lip again, and shifted in her seat. “I know it’s stupid, and he probably doesn’t even … whatever, but I feel like, if he could just _see_ me, really _look_ at me … y’know?”

Finn nodded, glancing up at the bar, looking for signs that Chop was headed back to their table. There were none.

“I do.” He thought about Rae’s hand on his chest, pushing him away. He thought about her hand limply patting against his side. His thoughts wandered back through the catalog of interactions with Rae, and he wondered if she ever saw him. Beyond the surface, into the heart of him.

But that was selfish, automatically translating Izzy’s lament over his own experience. He took a drink and said, “I think he’s a little scared, Iz.”

Her eyes grew wide. “Of ME?” she squeaked.

“More of … messing things up. He talks a good game about his … romantic history, but he’s not really the stud he claims to be.”

Hearing this made Izzy look at Chop with even more fondness, a thing Finn had not thought possible. She looked like she’d been animated for Disney. Hearts might start swirling around the crown of her red hair any moment. “Really?” Her voice was soft and high and shot through with an extra dose of hope.

“Yeah … he’s got all those brothers, and they … it’s like a pissing contest over everything in his house. Who’s eaten the most chips, who’s lifted the most weight, who’s had the most girls … y’know? He’s … it’s hard for him to not boast and brag.” Finn patted her shoulder lightly.

Izzy smiled at him for his trouble. “Thanks, Finn. For listening, for not making me feel stupid about my crush.”

“Hey, nothing to feel stupid about! Crushes are hard. If they weren’t, they’d be called something else.” He drained his glass and stood up. “Y’want another drink?” he asked.

Izzy shook her head, slowly sipping on her bright blue drink. He stood up and started to walk to the bar.

“Finn?”

He turned at hearing his name, a wistful question hanging in the air.

“Yeah, Iz?”

“Don’t say anything, yeah? I mean, I just …” She looked down, and didn’t look back up.

“I won’t. Don’t worry.”

He saw the corners of her mouth lift into a small smile.

When he got the the bar, Chop and the barman had just broken into gales of laughter over something or other. When he recovered, Chop clapped his hand to Finn’s shoulder and bellowed, “Finn, my man! What’re you having?”

“Just a pint. I’ll get it.”

Chop shrugged. “Suit yourself. Does the fair Isabel want another?” He chuckled, and Finn gave him a sharp look.

“Nah. She’s fine. Probably just wants a bit of company.” Finn reached into his pocket and slid two pounds across to the bartender, who nodded as he tilted a glass under the tap and pulled him a fresh pint.

“Fair enough. See ya,” he nodded at the bar and headed back to their table.  
Finn took his pint and change and leaned an elbow against the bar, sipping the foam off the top.

The door opened and Rae paused just inside, looking around, looking uncertain, until she saw Chop and Izzy chatting at their usual table. She visibly relaxed and started over, but Finn found himself calling out, “Rae!” She stopped in her tracks, eyes widening in surprise.

“Hey, sorry,” he said, trying to sound calm, even though Izzy’s voice was echoing in his head, _I just want this._ “You want anything to drink?” he continued, voice squeaking a little on the last word.

She hesitated for a moment before changing her trajectory to join him at the bar. “Sure. I’ll have a snakebite, I guess.”

Finn looked to the bartender to see if he’d heard her. Seeing him nod and turn around to grab a glass, Finn turned back to Rae. He twitched a shoulder at Chop and Izzy and said, “Giving ‘em a minute or two.”

Rae smiled at that. “Yeah? Any progress on that front?”

Finn shrugged. Chop could be so dense; everyone else could see it. “Not really, but …” He swallowed, suddenly nervous. “One can hope.”

Rae looked into his eyes for a long moment, then pulled her gaze away to take the proffered drink. Finn blinked rapidly, then started in realization and dug into his front pocket for some change to pay for it.

When he turned back, Rae was holding her pint up to him. “Thanks,” she murmured. He replied with a tight-lipped nod. “What should we drink to?” she asked, still holding her pint up.

He shrugged, but held his glass aloft next to hers.

She clinked her glass against his, and said, “To hope.”


End file.
